Babaryka to prison guards: "I had it, now I don't, but there's a chance I will. And you never had it, don't have it, and never will. And neither will your children"

Viktar Babaryka. Photo: Nasha Niva

Viktar Babaryka assures that if he ever starts writing a book, he will title it "Happy Loser." In his opinion, the events of 2020 can be called a failure on one hand, as they didn't achieve what they wanted. However, he doesn't feel disappointed because of it.

"In fact, I'm happy that the year 2020 happened in my life. In any case, if I hadn't experienced it, I would regret not having done so."

According to him, a similar situation applies to the bank:

"I had a bank, I loved it very much. But, as you say, the shareholders didn't support it, supposedly no one supported it. So, does that mean the bank was bad? How so? It was an excellent bank."

As Babaryka explains, this perception of events – where "on one hand it's a failure, and on the other hand you live as a happy person" – helped him psychologically endure imprisonment.

"I understood that I was much freer than the people around me, including the guards," the former political prisoner asserts and gives an example:

"They really liked to tell me, when they came and showed me papers about what I had lost, what had been taken from me. And they would say: do you understand? I said: you know, what's the difference? They asked: what? I said: I had it, now I don't, but there's a chance I will. You never had it, don't have it, and never will. And your children will have the same. That's the scariest thing."

According to Babaryka, what matters is not how long a person possessed something in life, but that there is always an opportunity to move forward. Life, according to him, is a journey, and goals within it are never definitively achieved. He compares it to the Great Wall of China: when it seems you've reached the last tower, another one appears behind it. So it is in life – a person constantly moves and overcomes new obstacles.

"You think: 'Well, I'll get there, and that's it, everything's done.' And when you're already approaching, suddenly you see that there's something else beyond it. You're constantly going somewhere. You're constantly overcoming something. This is the psychology that allowed me to survive," says Babaryka.

In addition, the second way to endure prison was the feeling that even in confinement, one could maintain control over one's own life and daily routine. Babaryka recounts that he tried to organize his time in such a way that the prison did not subordinate him, but rather he himself – as much as possible – subordinated his own life to these conditions.

"You can do exercises yourself, you can do something. My day was scheduled literally for all possible opportunities. Every 15 minutes of every hour – walking around the cell. (...) Sudoku saved me a lot. A wonderful game: if not for prison, I wouldn't even know its name. The book they give you once a week, you have to read all week. So, you have to read it. Every half hour you should read something, do something. Clean the cell.

It's not time, not the prison that subordinates you – you subordinate it. You build your life, even in these restricted conditions, the way you want. Yes, in a confined space. But even in it, you can walk four meters left, four meters right. It depends on you. You can change that."

When asked what exactly in life gave him a sense of happiness that he would not exchange for anything, Viktar Babaryka replied:

"The fact that I always did what I considered necessary. That is, I specifically wrote my life. I cannot shift the blame onto anyone else, but I also cannot shift success onto anyone else. I am grateful to those who helped me, but I was always sure – no one made me. I did it myself."

According to Babaryka, many people tend to blame others when something goes wrong, but at the same time attribute all successes to themselves. He tried to maintain balance: to acknowledge his responsibility for both successes and mistakes.

"Everything that happened to me is actually the result of my actions. And it's very good when you understand that you yourself paint your life. Whether it's good or bad – but it's yours. (...) To sum up, it's probably the feeling of being a creator. You are the creator of your own life. And that's immense satisfaction."

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